Saving Old Seagulls

Everytime I stop at a hole in the wall....there is nobody around for miles....as soon as I go to the hole in the wall..about 5 ppl appear from nowhere.

And am sick of charity's bombarding me with adverts about saving the budgie..saving the cat ..saving the salad ...please donate...u go to the shopping centre...and there is some person rattling a can in front of ur face...buying ur groceries at the till there is some 10 yr old wanting money for their dance lessons or whatever...and then celebrities millionaires wanting u to donate ur hard earned cash to some panda with depression..then u have got the immigrant beggars on the street outside the supermarkets wanting money...I keep saying to myself...u have travelled half way round the world to the uk to beg.. the world is changing..and not for the better am thinking....
rant over.

Hail/hail GOD HELPS THOSE WHO HELP THEMSELVES the dole is there for those who don't charity begins at home as for those pandas have you seen the price for the loan on them I'm quite sure i could've picked up a couple for less in the gorbals there's a few on the loose....

Would someone out there please pretty please oh so help me could you would you please help me .
I'm suffering so bad I ain't got no money my mum and dad are gone my wife and kids have left and so can you please dig deep and help me out.
I'm suffering terrible like . I'm really hurting.
All I want is an immaculate going marston which if in really good nick I can assist in paying for some of the feddex charges.
If its not immaculate don't bother me you uncouth ungrateful miserly tightwadly bleating spoilt despots while you wallow in luxury and I'm stuck out here in the cold fighting all the demons .
Without a marston.
Someone send me a marston , a really good marston, now,
If it would make it easier I could set up a bank acct for donations so I could buy myself a marston but I'm not too keen on that as I'm so tied up lately and ain't got much spare time. No, just give me a marston, ok.

A few months back when I was a bludger on the old age pension I called into a shopping centre to an ATM money machine to draw out some of my non earned money.
Nearby were 2 youngish people , squatting on the ground with placards around their necks proclaiming all sorts of illnesses etc and requesting assistance from suckers like me.
Being in a particular grumpy mood I then gave each one a verbal blast about the uselessness and mind destroying lifestyle they were involved in and not to bother me when I' grumpy.
One apologized for his presence and withdrew his placard but pointed out that the other miscreant was genuinely Incapacitated as a working member of society , leaving me suddenly gasping for apologies.
So I then walked over and apologized to this miscreant and gave him $10 but while he was smiling I mentioned the possibility of a broken leg if he told anyone about the $10 .
To this very day T still cannot figure out how I got done so easy.
Hes my Jimmy Spithill.

could you would you please help me .
I'm suffering so bad I ain't got no money my mum and dad are gone my wife and kids have left and so can you please dig deep and help me out.

You must be loaded

Rich. You gotta be joking.
Interesting you mention the Gorbals.
I found out my Irish ancestors lived there 1850-1870 and it obviously was the pits but then a few years back I got told the Gorbals had been flattened and the area totally renewed.
Is that true?

All I want is an immaculate going marston which if in really good nick I can assist in paying for some of the feddex charges.
If its not immaculate don't bother me you uncouth ungrateful miserly tightwadly bleating spoilt despots while you wallow in luxury and I'm stuck out here in the cold fighting all the demons .
Without a marston.
Someone send me a marston , a really good marston, now,
If it would make it easier I could set up a bank acct for donations so I could buy myself a marston but I'm not too keen on that as I'm so tied up lately and ain't got much spare time. No, just give me a marston, ok

Quite amusing and not as daft as it sounds, in this age of must have!

Grumpy wrote:Rich. You gotta be joking.
Interesting you mention the Gorbals.
I found out my Irish ancestors lived there 1850-1870 and it obviously was the pits but then a few years back I got told the Gorbals had been flattened and the area totally renewed.
Is that true?

Very true then the spray can came alone.

Please help, wife and 2 Seagulls to support!